Mommy Life as a House

I always thought of myself as a house. I was always what I lived in. It didn't need to be big. It didn't even need to be beautiful. It just needed to be mine. I became what I was meant to be. I built myself a life. I built myself a house.-- George Monroe from Life as a House

    Well dear friends, I hope your mug is full!  As I sip my delicious brew of java, I am reminded of a conversation I had with some great moms..  Let's think outside the box right now dawlings and picture your house as a metaphor for parenting.  When we look at it that way it's easy to see how parenting has changed how we live, where we live, the rooms we live in, even the 'foundation' we build our lives as parents on.

The Framing:  What shapes the structure of our houses is dependent on what materials we wish to use.  Parenting styles vary but all generally include affection, nurturing, self-esteem, responsibility, and commitment.  During tough times your frame may stretch or bend but stays ever-strong.  Keeping your frame from wavering against outside influences is often tricky and can be reinforced by the strength of friends and family supporting you.

The Basement:  We might as well start from under ground, for that is where we find memories of our own childhood and past events that have shaped us as moms.  We take the good and the bad and keep these memories close when deciding how to bring our own children up. Take a moment to dust off some of those memories and reflect.

The Family Room:  The most social part of our house is where we deal with the present; friends, family, siblings, parents, and our children.  We tend to compare and pass judgment on these people in our lives.   How messy is your family room? 

The Kitchen:  The place of nourishment, literal or figurative.  Who is the nourishing figure in your home?  Who cooks and cleans this area?  The food we choose to give our family matters a great deal.  It's very hard today to fuel our bodies with the cleanest foods.  For more information on the importance of good food check out this place! http://www.foodmatters.tv

The Bathroom:   Topics of health, well-being, vanity, body image, weight, and aging crops up in this room.  Grrreat! Now that baby is here we have our body image to fret about!  Learning to deal with our own bag of bathroom issues can give way to a more confident promotion of health for our children.  Love your scars of motherhood, care about the things that are important and forget the scale!

The Kids' Rooms:  You know you love your muchkins, but do they know how much?  Admittedly there are days we feel like failures.  There are also some days we could shout on the top of a mountain to the surrounding world how much we love our jobs as moms.  How do you spend your time in here? As long as you don't sweat the small stuff; praise when your little ones deserve praise, teach them the power of consequence, and show them they are loved, you will always have this room to be proud of building!

The Office:  The place you sort your career, finances and ambitions!  As a mom you are the CEO of your family. Tasks that need to be done daily are similar to business meetings.  Weekly checklist for planning meetings with your clients ( children) are just as important as conference calls in the workplace.  Some weeks you will be able to make everything happen, other weeks you may just get one done.  You are the boss, you set the schedule. Don't forget the coffee breaks!

The Bedroom:  The room with a lot going on!  Desire, connection, and rest takes place here.  Since baby came into your life, how has this room changed?  Balancing your personalities (mom vs. woman) is a constant juggling act.  Some families co-sleep with their little ones and can't find the time and place to connect as easily as before baby.  Do what works best for you is always my motto, and make sure parents caring for babes don't forget to care for each other!

The Attic: The should-have, could-have, would-have talk.. Yep that's right! self-guilt hangs out up there.  It's good to de-clutter this place, but that's easier said than done!  My advice is to quiet that inner voice that compares you to other moms--none of us really know what we are doing!  Meltdowns happen and being at the top you feel you could have prevented every tantrum--forget about it!  Mama said there'd be days like that remember? catchy song and the soundtrack to our lives some days!  

     So build your house the way you want to.  Protect your family in it, grow in it, and reflect on the beauty of it.  Your role as a parent takes top priority, so let the rooms get messy from time-to-time and have fun! Be well, and meet me for coffee again!